I think reality is finally starting to hit me. I made it through a month and it was the hardest month of my life. Now I feel worn out and emotionally exhausted. Isn't this over yet? I am just starting to grasp the fact that I am going to have do this for the rest of my life. I really don't know how I'm going to make it.
Dema and Valek are starting to go down hill again. I thought for sure that because Heavenly Father took you from us, he would bless us all that we would be ok. Why aren't they ok? Why are they returning to what they did before you left? It's hard enough to deal with you being gone, I just don't think I can handle them too. And I know Dad can't and shouldn't have to.
